Dear so and so

Dear John McCain,

How the fuck could you have picked Sarah Palin as your VP? What if you dumb asses had won the election and then you died soon thereafter? A wingnut religious zealot retard as President?!!!!! Seriously John, that was one fucked up move. She didn’t even know that Africa was a continent……..a continent for fucks sake. Africa?!!!!!! What the fuck do they teach in the Wasilla school system? Sarah Palin is one child that was totally left behind.  John, don’t ever be that stupid again.

There is only one way to repair your image and that is to oppose the religious right extremists in your party while you are still in the Senate. Get that maverick back you idiot. Throw them all under the Straight Talk Express. And do it now.

Sincerely,

Iceberg Wedge

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Dear so and so

Dear Sarah Palin,

If this was your High School yearbook this is what I would write to you (not that your bitch ass self would have asked me to sign your Moosewood High yearbook anyway….but).

Sarah Palin-future cross eyed retard

Sarah Palin-Voted most likely to be "1st place loser" in a number of competitions. Known for her catch phrase: "In what respect Charlie?"

Dear Cross Eyed Moose Hunter,

Don’t ever change. You should totally run for President in 2012. That would be awesome hilarious.

Sign me the guy at the back of geography class that laughed at you all the time for being so fucking stoopit.

Sincerely,

Iceberg Wedge

Hero

Hero

Mayor Jerry Sanders of San Diego, you are a hero. Thank you for going with your heart.

Update: Forgot to mention that I first saw this on Daily Kos.  Also the press conference happened in September of 2007.

Occasional John McCain Rumor #12

Pssst, not only does John McCain not speak to Sarah Palin much anymore, he apparently has started throwing his feces (usually has some in his diaper) at her when they are both on the “Straight Talk George Wallace Revival Express.”  Pass it on.

I just thought I would let you know

I just thought I would let you know that I have a crush on Debbie Wasserman Schultz (Skip the first half with Tom “had to leave the Congress in disgrace” Delay and go to about the 8 minute mark and watch Debbie do her thing.).

I just thought I would let you know.

Dear so and so

Dear John McCain and Sarah Palin,

Fuck you with your “real America” bullshit. Fuck you with your “culture wars” fucktardary. Fuck you with your attempts to divide the whole country so that you might win an election. Fuck you with your cries of socialism and terrorism. Fuck you because you guys totally suck ass.

That is all I have to say to you, but I think Barack Obama was talking to you idiots and your legion of drooling wingnuts today in Richmond, VA. I have provided it here for you just in case you missed it.

Occasional John McCain rumor #10

Pssst, John McCain is in the beginning stages of alzheimer’s and poops his diapers at least three times a day. Pass it on.

Also, by his own standards he is now a “trollop and a cunt.”